I took a walk around the block with Gabby, my 12-year-old Golden mix, just now. She is always an inspiration to me on these walks; I like seeing her tail wagging the whole time, I like her respectful interest in squirrels, and I like the delicate way she lifts one paw to sniff one of those reeeeallly good smells for about half an hour. I’ve heard dogs’ sniffing called reading the canine newspaper, and they DO make sniffing look so intriguing that I am sometimes close to pushing them aside and saying, “Hey, let ME have a go!”
On our walk, we passed a house I am redoing. I see that the floors are going in today, and naturally I am very excited to run over and see how everything looks when they’re done. I’m redoing this house because l am sick to death of the 44 steps in my house, and although it’s no problem now to go up and down them now, it will probably become one. So I thought, why don’t I design an age-in-place house where I can do one- floor living AND put in a whole lot of other things I’ve always wanted: a HUGE pantry. A pot filler stationed on the wall just above the dog dishes. A much bigger closet so I have more room to store clothes I neither want anymore nor need. (You know how it goes. You go in your closet to clean it out, hold up one garment, can’t make up your mind about keeping or tossing and so you quit cleaning out your closet and go downstairs for a nice piece of buttered toast. At least that’s what I do.)
ANYWAY, in addition to the above, I’m putting in a generous size dog run with gravel so the mutts won’t come in with muddy feet. This is to mitigate what happens now: Austin runs out in the yard and leaps my ridiculously small fence to roam in the garden, rooting around like a truffle hog. Never mind my standing on the back deck in my pajamas saying, “AUSTIN! GET OUT OF THAT GARDEN! COME AND GET YOUR COOKIE!” The most I’ll get out of him is, “Hmmm. What kind of cookie?” and then “Maybe later.”
Back to the house: I’m getting a much bigger refrigerator because I never have enough room in mine. I hope that doesn’t mean I’ll lose the Dijon mustard because I forgot where I put it. (Why don’t they design a refrigerator with lazy susan type shelving?) I’m getting a soaking tub. I’m getting a reading room. I’m getting a cozy nook for watching television. A huge library. Nice guest rooms.
Here’s the problem.
When I walked past that house today, a little tiny voice inside said, “I don’t WANT to move.”
I opened a kitchen drawer this morning and, among other items, found these: approximately 7,000 pens and pencils. Scratch paper. Matches. Barrettes. Embroidred napkins I got at a thrift store and then found too pretty to use. Red votive candles that I never seem to use and now have melted somewhat and look like evidence at a crime scene. Business cards. Coupons. I could go on. But I looked in that drawer and I thought about how, if I move, I’ll have to clean it out. It and all the other drawers in my house. And then I got very tired and that’s when Gabby said, “Are we going to take a walk anytime soon? Such as, in this calendar year?” So I took her for a walk, and went past the house and heard the aforementioned voice but guess what? It was NOT because all my drawers are overfilled. It was because I’d be leaving my home for a home when I already have a home, if you catch my drift.
Maybe it’s too soon to leave where I live. I love the idea of aging-in-place, but maybe someone else can do that there. Because when I wake up in the middle of the night here, I know where everything is.
Or maybe it’s because I resonate more and more to what Mary, a Polish woman who used to clean my house said one day, “Old people like trees. Not like roots pulled up.”
All I can tell you is that when I walked past that house in progress and thought about NOT moving into it, I began to sing. I regret to tell you it was the Brownie Smile song, do you remember it? “I have something in my pocket that belongs upon my face….” Luckily, I was singing VERY softly, so as to not let anyone else hear.
Gabby: Not that softly.
Love this piece. I don’t want to move from my home with all it’s stairs, even though reality may make that necessary. It’s where my babies grew into the men they are now. Long ago I was a Brownie. When you mentioned that song, I was amazed I could recall the words and sing along with you! Thanks for the memory. 😊
The part about having to clean the drawer in order to move made me lol. We have a 76x32 barn full of stuff we’d have to move if we move. I just look at my metal circular stairs I haven’t been up in 5 years. And I laugh.